Well here we go, New Years resolutions and all, making a commitment to blogging again. Life has certainly been full of ups and downs since I last made an entry, and sadly there’s been more downs in the better part of last year. But now I am resolving to pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again as the old song goes.
Sometimes I feel like I’m going through some kind of test- because that’s what this past year has felt like. My sister had her beautiful cruise wedding and all went really well, generating wonderful memories of a magic time for all of us aboard the ship. But after returning home, it seemed as though everything began to unravel bit by bit. First, I lost my job that I had for years and really enjoyed. The job paid really well, and as the bread-winner of the family going through hard times, it was really important for me to have this job. But poof- it was over and done with, suddenly leaving me with tons of time on my hands. It’s really hard to get in the slow lane after having gone 90 miles an hour for most of your life. I had a hard time getting used to not having to get up and go. After about a month, I did manage to land another job in my same field. I remember going through the door, getting in my car and heading out to my first day with great anticipation…innocently thinking all would be well now. I was wrong. Really wrong. The job was awful. The circumstances I was thrown into were a nightmare and I quickly realized I should have stayed on unemployment a bit longer. Anyway, I hated it there and in less than 6 weeks gone. So, back to collecting unemployment, back to trying to find another good job.“When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.”
Finally, I did learn to slow down and to relish the time I had to myself to do the things I couldn’t fit into my hectic and overworked schedule of the past, but before I did so I went through a kind of withdrawal, finding it really hard to leave the fast lane. But time heals everything and now I’m enjoying the precious time I have to myself to bake, sew and enjoy my home and family. Hopefully I will be able to find another job, but for now I will appreciate the time I have to myself now, at this moment.