Cancer and chemo are no fun. I started out big and brave, resigning to my future with battling breast cancer.
First came all the tests…mamograms, ultra sounds, pet scans, biopsies and finally diagnosis. Stage 2 lobular invasive cancer. Then…decisions? Choose now, mastectomy or lumpectomy. Who in the world could possibly advise me on such a subject? Because, yes, they want you to make the decision all on your own. I chose lumpectomy, because it seemed easier to deal with than breast reconstruction. Also, if it comes back I will give ’em both up.
They did the lumpectomy, which means they removed the 1.5 centimeter lump and left kind of a crater in my left breast, at 4:00 position. Not too bad, but when I did my follow up with the surgeon, she informed me that I did not have clear margins yet and they would have to go back in and do a little more removal of tissue. The tests also revealed that I had another kind of breast cancer as well, in situ in my duct.
OK one more round, even though I did not want to go through it again, I did it. So now the Cancer has been cut out of me and it’s time for my Chemo treatments.
Chemo is one of the hardest things I ever did. I consider myself a strong person, able to bear and bounce back from anything. I was widowed at the age of 33 when my newborn daughter was only a month old. My husband died in a car accident. I made it through that as best as I could. Now was another test of my endurance, strength and attitude. Somehow I got through the Chemo and radiation, feeling fatigued and sick most of the time. Gradually, I came back to feeling normal and made a vow to get healthy. I changed my diet, started exercising again and was able to build my self up again. Halleluia!
Fast forward to my current illness. 3 weeks in the hospital and major surgery has left me weak once again. All to familiar and I hate it! Usually, I am a very energetic person, ready to embark on impromptu trips, jumping into an advanced step class at the gym, taking dance classes and thowing parties at my job as a social director. So, I’m finding it really difficult this time to be so weak and unable to do the things I love to do. I am hoping I will get enough strength back to return to work some time next week. Tomorrow is my Dr. appointment and I am waiting to get the word from him as to when I can get back to reality.
OK, that’s enough whining for now, I just had to get it off my chest! Onward & upward.